Before my mom passed last month, one of our most recent discussions regarded my upcoming milestone of turning 30. I told her that lately a lot of my close friends have had their 30th birthdays this year, but not too many are thrilled about it. Actually, I’ve seen a trend of depression and silence when it came to this birthday. “Why do you think that is? How were you when you turned 30?” I asked mom. Well she told me it was one of her hardest birthdays to get through. She said she remembers having an old beat up car, a job that wasn’t paying enough and that looming feeling of feeling overworked and not good enough in comparison to other folks.
“Wow, and this was before facebook!” I said. We continued to talk, and I confirmed that she did have a car (trusted transportation to and from where ever you want to go), a steady job that helped developmentally disabled individuals and you were living and married to the love of your life.
“That sounds Amazing!” And she agreed, looking back on it those were golden years and the
subjective struggles that we have are what makes life so sweet. I told her that I wanted to do a
“Fearless 30” photo session with just me embracing this milestone and just basically saying “Yes,
I’m thirty and I don’t have all my shit together and it’s ok. I’m still striving for greatness, I’ve
achieved a lot in my 20’s but I’m still working hard to achieve the life I want to live. Each fail in my
20’s has been a learning experience that I use in my platform to reach my future goals. I accept
happiness whenever it comes to me and smile whenever I can. I accept all gifts the universe has to provide with an open heart and mind. I firmly believe that God doesn’t give us anything that we can’t handle and that he challenges us daily to push our limits. I’m ready for whatever he has to dish out and prepared to work hard for everything He has for me and my family.”
When mom passed mid-July, I was crushed and as an only child with a small family it’s been hard
to just do the normal things in life without falling apart. So when my make-up artist friend Tanya
(Elite Secrets) reached out to me to see if we were still on, I hesitated. I was speaking to my
husband, Garrett, at the time and I remember him saying “Come on, you said you were going to do this for months...” He knew how much this meant to me and even though I was in no mood to get all dolled up, I did. I asked Dad if he wouldn’t mind coming out with us to take photos, because Mom always wanted us to take family photos and I just couldn’t make this photoshoot all about me anymore. This had turned from a Self-love Photoshoot to a “Yea, I’m turning 30 but I need and love my family” Photoshoot. We took moms painted portrait with us and headed over to one of our favorite overlooks.
When we arrived, I noticed a familiar face parked next to us. Than another recognizable face, and
then another!! Garrett had invited some of my trusted friends to the hilltop to join us for this
moment. And Baby, it was a whole moment!! Everyone wore all white (Except Clifton who
apparently didn’t get the memo) and we all got together to watch the sunset and completely
changed the tone of this photoshoot once more. We ended the day on a loving and fearless note,
with a message saying that even though you may not feel like the most accomplished it’s more about how you choose to spend your time here on this planet. Because when you’re no longer physically here, we won’t be talking about how raggedy your car was or how much money you were making.
Your loved ones will continue to speak on character, how kind you were to others, how you’ve lifted their spirits and how you have helped them in their time of need. You will be remembered by your unlimited good works towards your family as well as strangers. So let each day be a celebration of ALL of light and goodness that you bring into this world and one day, all of the legacy that you will leave behind.
Mom, I love you soooo much and you will forever be one of the most beautiful parts of me that I hope to pass on one day.
August 11, 2018- Megan’s 30th Birthday, Mom and Dad’s 45th Wedding Anniversary, Aero’s 1 st
Thank you Garrett for not only taking on most of these images in this blog, but for the ongoing support and positivity that you bring into my life everyday. You're pretty damn incredible man and you are truly one of my favorite blessings :)